.My Journal.
Ack......here comes a long journal entery. What have I been up to?
Lots and lots of stuff, my friends. I apologize for that long absence of not being able
to update; I kind of abandoned PD for awhile there, but I PROMISED that I would
start a healthy habit of updating PD every day again. The only exceptions are if
something vitally important comes up or I am having a friend come over; because obviously
I'm not going to ignore my friend for the computer, it's rude and unfair—and of course the
whole point of having them over is to actually be able to see them, talk to them, and have
fun with them. Anywaysss, getting off track here—about my sadness. There are tons of things
I have to explain here. Okay, well, you see, I'm a " confusing " person, if you will.
I can be happy, cheerful, and laughing one moment and then something someone says can set
me off into a foul or really depressed mood the next. Don't ask why. Whenever I'm REALLY, REALLY
mad, I'll advise you—the best thing you can do is stay away from me. Whenever I'm extremely, extremely, mad,
I get snippy with EVERYBODY. It's rare for me but it happens occassionally.
So watch out; if my MSN name says " Everybody leave me alone " or " no one talk to me ", I'd really
advise you to stay away—usually if you end up opening a conversation with me, I won't reply much,
I'll just usually reply with a lot of " Yeah..." " Oh's " " Okays " and " Mhmms."
If I'm ticked off enough, one wrong thing you say could REALLY unleash my anger to it's fullest,
and I'll get really snippy then. That's pretty rare for me, infact, it's VERY rare for me
to yell at my friends ( seriously ), it usually only happens if I'm in the foulest mood ever,
so don't get to worked up about it. Even if I get a little snippy, just don't take it personally.
So that's how to deal with my anger. With my sadness, usually the best thing you can do is
compliment me and say stuff like " Don't worry, we'll always be there for you," or say something
really funny that would make me laugh ( but if I'm really depressed, I warn you— that
dosen't really work. ) The best thing you can do when I'm sad is just remind me that I have friends
and say stuff about me that would make me feel better. I know I seem selfish and self-centered right
now like I want everyone to look up to me, but really, whenever someone is sad, that is usually
the right way to bring them around—and that applies to EVERYONE. If I'm extremely, extremely depressed,
I'd advise not fooling around too much or mentioning other inside or private jokes with friends—
that gets me WAY more depressed and then I REALLY won't come around no matter what then.
And I'll even get a little annoyed, impatient, and a tiny bit ticked off. I usually have a good reason
to be depressed though. I don't believe in being depressed just because your dad is away for like 2 days
or something. You know he'll be back; that's no reason to get all emo and get really depressed.
You want to hear about MY problems? For one, my Nan and Grandpa moved away. And seriously, none of you
know on here how much my family loved her and cherished her and how extremely upset all of us were
when she moved away. You really don't. And she moved all the way to Newfoundland and it's expensive
to get there, so I'll very very rarely get to see her. I don't think I'll see her for years yet.
Also, to make things worse, my Uncle Jason then moved away to Calgary. We'll NEVER get to visit him,
he's just gonna come visit us once a year or once every other year. That still isn't going to make
me and my family feel much better. Third of all: my cousins Joel and Merceddes. If you knew
what they had to live with every day, you'd be pretty sad about it to. I'm sorry to say,
but my so called Aunt and Uncle are very abusive to them. My Aunt only abuses him because
my " Uncle " does ( he's not even my real Uncle anyways so I shouldn't even call that BEAST
that ), and she's afraid of him because he hits her and yells at her like he yells at the kids.
He's made marks on my cousins before, pulled their hair and shoved them too. Joel had to lock
himself out one time because he was afraid of what my " Uncle " would do to him.
Not only does he physically abuse them, he verbally abuses them, too.
Since they are a little overweight, he calls them " fat fu**s", " fat little bastar*s",
" stupid little bit*es", and all of that stuff. He even taunts them for being overweight.
And then when he comes around to my mom's place he always acts mostly nice and stuff, but we
all know what he REALLY is like. One time it got so bad that my Grandma called the police on them
and My Aunt and " Uncle" ran away in the car on a school night so the police couldn't get to them
and then returned home at midnight—on a school night, as I mentioned before—and my cousins still
had to go to school the next day and act like nothing happened. My cousin Joel tells me it's
like torture and hell living in his house and he hates it; him and Merceddes always regretfully
say they wish I could move in with me and my sister. But as you know, my mom has 5 kids, 4 to
deal with at home, and we live in a tiny house for such a large family with so many animals, too.
Literally. Joel always seems so very sad whenever he tells me and my sister about how his " dad "
treats him ( he's not even his real dad anyways ), his voice is always really depressed and regretful,
as if he wished he could be pulled from his constant torture living at home. Eh, my poetic,
English-geek side keeps coming through...anyways, the point is, I feel really bad for my cousins,
and not only do they have to put up with what they do at home, they have to put up with constant
teasing at school, too. It's sickening. I can't even call my Aunt my REAL Aunt and that idiot
my REAL Uncle; to me, they are like strangers, like we should have never even met.
I can't believe how they put on an act around others but treat my cousins so disgustingly.
Another thing is those stupid reactions when I tell people this:: My Grandma fell in love
with my Uncle Joe. No, he's NOT her real kid, he's her step kid, and they never really
saw eachother so she never felt as if he was her real kid. ( No, they're not married and they
don't have any kids, either. ) I don't get why that's so wrong and people think that's so messed
up when I tell them. It ticks me off really badly. What the f is WRONG with you people?!
It isn't weird. It's natural. I guess none of you would really understand though, coming from " normal, clean"
families...sorry, very angry and emotional moment there. I have a lot to let off my back. No family is
perfect, including mine. Another thing about my depression is that I'm still extremely sad about Pepper.
No one knows how much I loved her. NO ONE. No one really understands how much pain it puts in my heart
to know that she is gone. And no, it's NOT alright; things will NEVER be alright again!! I loved
her so dearly and then she was just snatched away from me by fate ( ugh, I have poetics on the mind...)
at a very early age. IT'S SO UNFAIR, AUGHHHHHHHH! * starts crying * She had cancer at the age of ONE.
ONE year old. She only lived for a year, three months, and 2 days. That's it. Does that seem fair to you?
It certainly dosen't to me. Another thing is the so many other pet deaths in the family. My Grandma's
dog Jesse was recently but down, and by God, she was THE sweetest dog in the world, and we all loved
her so much, and that stupid pet food re-call poisioned her. My Aunt Michelle's cat Layla was recently
put down, too. She was an amazing and affectionate cat, we all loved her, and then of course, she
was taken away from us. She had diabetes, a very severe and strict form of it, too.
She had to get insulin shots and be put on strict medication every day, too. I feel so bitter, because
my family is all torn and shred to pieces. We've managed to survive through it all, but I don't
know how much longer I can keep it up before I REALLY break down in depression. Anywayssss,
I guess I better end that, and get on to MY EXCITING NEWS today.
I was chosen along with three other people in my class to go to a University!!! Seeds University,
to be precise. I was surprised, because only the best and hard-working students get selected to
go there. I was SO happy! My teacher selected me because of my writing skills. He always tells
me I am an extremley good writer and I always get level 4's and 100 percents on my essays and writing
assignments and stuff. He says tons of good stuff about my writing. I was excited when he told my mom
he chose me to go to the university because of my " very strong writing talent " and said that
my writing always made him think. I will be going for three days. And guess what?! LILY was chosen
out of ONE other person from her class, too! So in total, four people in my class are going including
me, and in Lily's class, only two people including herself are going. For the bad news,
now THIS really made me upset— I'm going to be tested for a learning disability in math.
My teacher already notified my mom that I'm already getting a failing grade in math.
My teacher told my mom that it HAD to be a disability because I did " extremely well " in everything
BUT math. ( It's true, I am a pretty good student-- I'm not bragging just because I do well
in school...I'm not a straight A student, but I'm good enough. ) Anyways, I have to get tutoring
for an hour, every single day after school. It's going to suck majorly. * sighs *
Now THIS is going to be boring...* sighs more * I'll never make it through math. Ever.
Well, I'm going to end this....it's getting way too long....oh yeah, I got an A+ on my Music project,
here's the write-up I did for it if you care to read it.
When I was listening to the song I chose for my project, I had a calm feeling come over me. I imagined love as something unchangable.
That's how I came up with my idea and interpreted the music. I think of love as a seasonal thing. That is why I added different seasons and
things in there. Like the seasons, love changes in many ways, but true love always has one thing staying the same.
And that thing is love for eachother.
And I believe that broken hearts can be mended if given enough time.
I added fading effects throughout the video to try to explain my feelings about that.
I had pictures of moons in there to show that there were long-awaited nights when you could see again,
and I pictured someone staring longingly out the window when I had that in mind. The pictures of rainbows show that there
is an end to the pain, and there will always be brighter tomorrows.
Through the graphics, I tried to explain how I felt and how these things happen, because that is how I feel.
Some love can be " forbidden", so through the video I tried to express that even if that somehow occurs, you will meet again some day and be
connected once again, even if that be after life. I threw in flowers as a symbolism of love.
I feel that love is unchangable. If it's true love, it will survive through the toughtest of times and the worst damage.
It will not change with the seasons.
I believe that true love always remains, and the best of it will always find a way to see past obstacles and rough times.
Love is a beautiful thing, and if you can contain it, you will be happier throughout life.
Well....
Lily and I had a heck of a time at my house. But anyways, right now,
I need to tell you some really good news ^o^: I'm in a good mood today! Lol.
Well not so much now, I'm really tired and worn out and have homework * grumbles *
But I mean at least I was. I got a 32/50 on my Math test, and I am so happy
about that! Math is my weakest subject and my most hated. I know that dosen't seem
like a big deal to you, but it really is to me. Let's just say I don't get very
good marks in Math ( I got 8/50 on the last test...maybe just 'cause I'm dumb.)
But anyways, I got a level FOUR ( an A ) on my essay for English, and it's counting
as like 30 percent of my grade, WHOOOOOOOO! My teacher says I am a very good writer ^o^
* ish all squishy and happy in side * Anywaysss, Lily and I basically did nothing
on the weekend. We watched videos on Youtube. She watched 4 out of my 13 videos,
and said they were all really, really good. We watched a lot of InuYasha ( YEAH!)
and of course, being me, we HAD to watch all of my favourite animes ( InuYasha,
FullMetal Alchemist, Naruto ) on Thursday and Friday night. ( I HAD A PA DAY
ON FRIDAY, YAYNESS WHOOOOOOO! ). WHOOOOOOO SCORE ONE FOR ME! I not only got Lily
addicted to InuYasha, I'm also getting her into FullMetal Alchemist now, whoooo!!
She says it's " actually a pretty cool show." :P Anywayssss, on to the Seances.
We held TONS AND TONS of those while she was here. Let's start with Thursday night...
in one hour we did like nine different seances. We heard a lot of scary things.
One is a very constant, heavy breathing that never stopped. And I mean it was frikkin'
LOUD. It sounded like someone was RIGHT next to us breathing loudly. And I mean it CONTINUED
through the whole seance. At times it was so frikkin' loud that it caused me and Lily to jump
on to my bed and turn on the t.v. right away. But it didn't stop....the breathing didn't, I mean.
It just kept getting worse. And another thing that happened was our hands kept getting really
cold. That happens A LOT, and I mean ALL the time whenever we do seances, and the window
isn't open and the fan isn't on or NOTHING. ( We always hold a seance with all of the lights out,
in complete darkness. ) The second night was really scary too. This was where it got even scarier.
There was moonlight streaming in through my window, and Lily and I could see a shadow of a little
girl's head. I swear to God. You could see it right on the wall, and the shadow didn't belong to
me nor Lily. Lily kept squeezing my hand and saying frightfully " Rylee I'm scared. Please can
we turn on the t.v." That night was the worst. For a long time after the breathing wouldn't
leave us alone. After we stopped holding seances and inbetween, we kept hearing loud breathing
coming from either my bed or Lily's ( or my sister's, but yeah. ) One time the breathing was right
in my ear...I frikkin' jumped up and RAN as fast as I could out of that room, tripping over things
along the way. But Lily slowed me down. She heard that breathing too and screamed, trying to
grab on to my hand but unsuccessfully ended up grabbing hold of my finger, pulling my arm out of it's
socket as I tried to run. Another time we saw a strange white outlined figure in my closet, it scared
us both so bad. ( Actually it was mostly Lily, surprisingly I was quite calm through the whole thing.
I always convinced Lily not to turn on the lights when we heard the breathing and stuff, unless
it got so bad and scared us crapless. ) Another time it was SO FREAKING SCARY...I saw a little
girl sitting beside Lily, grinning evily at me. It scared me so bad I gasped and covered my face
with the blanket. And when I looked back, it was just gone. I didn't tell Lily because I knew
she'd be really freaked out. ANYWAYS, one time my sister did it with us and we heard whistling
as clear as day. It was coming from my side of the bed and it was SO CREEPY. It was like someone
was actually IN THE ROOM whistling loudly. Both my sister and I heard it extremely clearly.
Whenever we do seances, we ALWAYS hear whistling for some odd reason. Another thing that happened was that
I had this incredibly weird flash. I'm like " If their are any spirits here, please make your presence
known." And then I closed my eyes to concentrate, and I opened them, and I saw this incredibly weird
flash, like it was lightning and a flashback mixed together. It looked somewhat like a flashback, y'know,
like you see in the movies and animes and stuff? It's incredibly hard to explain...but it was just so weird.
Then again, I've always seen and heard anything that other people don't...alright, now on to the freakiest
event of the ( Friday ) night. Lily and I were in the bedroom watching InuYasha ( the ending theme song )
and my sister came in, looking all wide eyed and really scared, clutching a teddy bear fearfully. She
claimed the sink tap turned on and off by itself. I said " How did you know someone wasn't in there?"
She said that the light was off and the door wasn't locked. So I was brave enough to go check.
And guess what...no one WAS in there. And guess what else? It couldn't have been anyone else. Because, you see,
my parents were sleeping IN BED and my little brothers were sleeping and my sister was on the Vista computer
outback and Lily and I were watching InuYasha. So really, who does that leave? .......
I'm extremely sure my sister was not lying about it; she looked way too scared and way too serious. I know her
when she lies. Anyways, I should wrap this up now before I make it too long.....And please take note on what
I said and analyze the possible coincidences. Well, I mean you can if you want, but I don't think it will get
you anywhere. Because these things are unexplainable. And no, for God's sake, there was no one else in the room
but me and Lily and I know for sure it wasn't one of us. One last note: I HATE SKEPTICS.
Something very strange happened over the weekend...
Well, I'm going to sound completely crazy and you probably won't believe me, but here goes::
A few days ago, I was talking to my friend Lily on the phone. We talked a lot about ghosts and ouija board and the Devil and excorcism and stuff. And then after we were done talking on the phone, I dove into the pool. For some strange reason, my neck started hurting bad for no entire reason at all. It felt like someone was jabbing their fingers and their long nails into my neck. The next day Lily came over.
And so, we planned to play an oujia board that day, hold a seance, etc. So I'm swimming, and then all of a sudden Alyssa gasps and says " Rylee! Where'd you get that scratch on your back?!" And Lily came over and say " Oh my god " and Mattison gasped and said the same thing. I had a big, long, deep scratch on my back. And now today...it completely faded
And I also discovered a big scratch on my leg, which is now almost all gone,
And I don't know where I got them from.
Both of them have dissapeared without a trace...
And that's not the worst of it. I have these huge, weird burnish red marks on my toes, and it really hurts. I don't know where I got them from. On every single toe there is a deep, red almost " burn " mark. It hurts to walk. And we had a seance in complete darkness the night before last night...
And we heard whistling, whispers, and saw a little boy sitting on my bed staring straight at us, and we saw a white orb, and there was a strange glow on the ceiling, and Mattison and I heard tapping on the wall right behind us, and I heard a crackling behind me, and I felt someone keep tickling my leg, running their hands up and down. And my sister felt a pain in her foot, and it really tingled, and she screamed " TURN ON THE LIGHT!" over and over again, until the last time we did.
And guess what we found? We found a big red mark on her foot.
After we turned the light back off, we felt a cold breeze go through us.
Like, Alyssa felt really cold, then Mattison did, and I did, and finally Lily did. And we were all holding hands, and it like, passed through us. Because after Mattison felt cold, Alyssa didn't anymore
And then Mattison felt cold, and then I felt cold, and my one hand stopped getting cold, but my one hand linking with Lily still felt cold, and then Lily felt really cold
It passed right through us.
We heard four whispers...well, they heard two, I heard all four.
I couldn't make out the first one.
The second one was a plain " hello "
The third one was " worship " or " worship me " or something like that.
And the last one was my name =/
I'm not lying about any of this...it was really creepy.
And both my sister and I saw something sitting right on my bed
It looked like a little boy,
He was all white,
and it looked like a human shape,
and when we turned on the light, we saw it was just plain wall behind him
And last night...
the planchette on the ouija board moved by itself.
kay, I decided to try something: I said to leave the planchette on the board and see if it moved when we came back. So we got a drink, and some freezies, and came back.
It didn't move.
So then my sister moved it as a joke, and you could tell she did it, because when I confronted her, she looked around and couldn't resist smiling, and then admitted it
So it's on the other side of the board now, in the middle.
So we sit down, we're eating our freezies and talking and laughing for five minutes, and then I look over and said " Who moved the planchette now?" And Alyssa and Mattison stopped laughing and looked serious and said they didn't do it.
It was all the way up on " Yes ", from the middle of the board.
None of us were over there.
we were sitting on the beds, far away from it.
We never even went over there after Alyssa moved it.
And there was a strange sharp thing in the mattress last night, the one Mattison was sleeping on.
I was sitting down, on the computer, when I felt a sharp pain in my leg, and looked down, and I got yet ANOTHER cut.
It was all bloody and gruesome looking,
and I got stabbed in the toe from something in Mattison's mattress =/
We couldn't figure out what it was.
There is something sharp in the mattress, or was, now we can't find it. I don't know what happened.
It all started just when Lily and I were talking about spirits on the phone,
And my neck started really hurting.
And I'm the one who has been getting all the injuries, except for Alyssa with her one injury... And just at around 7 on August 13 (today) I was swimming with my cousin Mattison, and she asked me if I wanted
to play the Ouija board, and I said maybe. And then less than two minutes later, I was just staring there, smiling
at my little brother Aiden, when I felt a sharp pain out of nowhere. I cried in pain and looked at my foot, and there
it was, plain as day...another scratch. Except it's not exactly a scratch, it's half scratch half BURN. And it was
strange, because it happened after Matti asked me if I wanted to play the Ouija board. IT HURTS SO BAD. It's so small
and it's causing a lot of pain; a teeth clencher. It hurts REALLY bad. Maybe it's just me over reacting, but I think
something strange is going on here...* holds foot in pain *
FUNNESS!!
I had an awesome time at my dad's =D First, he picked us up, and then we went to go get Lily. The trouble is, we were driving around for 50 minutes before we found her house :/ All thanks to me. You see, we actually weren't in Lily's town. It was all a big mix up :S When we finally figured that it wasn't the actual road where she lived, we went up the almost 15 minute road to where she lives, and I pointed at around 3 houses saying " That's her house!" and my Dad would give me a look and say " Are you sure?" and I would say " Maybe not..." LOL, it was so funny, you'd just have to be there. I got us lost XDD Anyway, so we pick Lily up, we're all hyper and giggly in the van, then we go to McDonalds. And guess what? We meet my friends Brian and James there. What a coincidence to meet them in the city like that. (Yesh, my Dad lives 40 minutes away from is in a city.) And so after that, we went to the library and I got the following books: Graduation day (a BSC Friends forever book), Everything Changes ( another BSC Friends forever book ), a Goosebumps book, called " The Curse of Camp Cold Lake ", three Babysitters Club books (or BSC) , which are Abby the Bad Sport, Mary Anne and Miss Priss, and Stacey's Mistake. I got a Fear street book, called " The boy who ate Fear street", and last but not least, a Puppy Patrol series book called " Saving Skye." So far I read three of them before I went home. Keep in mind these are all chapter books. I just love to read XD I finished the Curse of Camp Cold Lake in an hour when I got home. Now I'm on my fifth book. ANYWAYS, after that, we went to a store where you can buy all kinds of used DVD's and Video cassettes, so I got Evil Dead 2. My sister got 2 Pokemon movies, OF COURSENESS XD And so we went home, and we played some stuff on the drums and the keyboard in my Dad's roomates' music room (he gives music lessons), THEN we watched the InuYasha Movie, then we danced to some music and read our books. Later on we had a breakfast-dinner. You know, bacon, eggs, toast. It was yummeh stuffsh, mmm <3 Anyways, later, at around 9:45 until 10:30, we held a Seance. It didn't work. My dad's house is really old and was built near an old Indian burial ground, AND his house used to be a church, AND people next door have died, but nothing happened. My dad kept trying to scare us and we convinved him to tell us some spooky stories, like of a guy (this is a TRUE story, by the way) who used to invite people in for tea, then knock them out with something like a shovel, and then cut their organs out and put them in his fridge, and wear their skin. It was SO gross. Luckily it happened FAR away from where I live, not even in Canada. Phew XD (And plus, that was a long time agoness, he'd probably be dead by now...I hope.) Then, we watched Evil Dead 2. It was funny more than scary. It was actually ment to be kind of funny XD The loud noises scared us more than the faces. We made fun of the movie the whole way through and giggled and had a good time. (My sister hates scary movies, so she was in my Dad's bedroom with him XD) It was good, though. Then we watched the InuYasha third movie and settled into bed. Lily fell asleep half way through. My sister and I watched all of it XD I can NEVER fall asleep through InuYasha! I don't know how Lily did it XD It was only like, 12 ' o clock. She falls asleep easily though, and definitley early. Anyways, the next morning, or today, we watched the InuYasha fourth movie almost as soon as we got up (no falling asleep through the movie this time, OWO.) And THEN guess what we did? We had a breakfast of bacon, eggs, and toast, and then we went out to the...FESTIVAL!! It was SO much funness! They had awesome rides there, but we only got to ride on four. One of them was this one where you stand straight up, and you're in like this big round thing...I have no clue how to explain it. Anyways, you basically get lifted up into the air and spin around really fast, and the thing tilts hugely, so much that you think you're going to fall right onto the other side, but there is a little bar in front of you, so obviously you can't. And the other one was called the Typhoon. It's like a scrambling thing. It's hard to explain. You sit in these little seats, like on the Scrambler, but instead, you lift high in the air and spin really, really fast, and you feel like you could fall out. It's really fun, so Lily and I went on it twice, along with the other ride. On the Typhoon, Lily kept her eyes shut and was screaming the whole time T.T I just smiled through the whole ride XD It was really fun. And that concludes my weekend. I'm really tired and worn out right now...so ja ne.
Uh..
Well, here we are. Not many things have happened in the past week. I feel so bored, too bored to write this. (how does that even make any sense? Well, don't ask me...) On Sunday I went to the drive-in with my Grandma. We got into an accident. (My Uncle Joe was with us, driving the van.) Just a little accident, I assure you not a single person was hurt. We were pulling out from the sidewalk because we had to let my Grandma in to the bank, when a car comes zooming up and slams into us. The whole side/front of their vehicle was smashed in/dented and we ended up with a big, long scratch on the side, a stalling motor, and a cracked headlight. Nothing too serious. Of course we had to sit there for an hour and a half and we were 20 minutes late for the movie. Luckily the movie was just starting when we arrived. We saw Evan Almighty, Knocked Up, Georgia Rules and Dead Silence. Dead Silence is the one about Mary Shaw and her venqualotrist (is that how you spell that?) dolls. I can't fully remember the rhyme, but it went something like this:: "Mary Shaw had no children, only dolls, [ insert two other lines here ] and if you see her in your dreams, be sure never to scream." If you screamed she cut your tounge out :O I love movies with haunted dolls, killer dolls, etc. I don't know why, they are just fun to watch =D The drive in was an all-nighter, and I made it all night. We were home by 6 AM. Anyways, I stayed there for two nights. And basically did nothing the rest of the week. I feel too lazy right now to right much :/ So bye for now, ja ne.
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Wednesday, June 6, 2007
RAWWRR RAHHHHHHH. Too lazy to type a big entery right now...I'm not sure if I should keep PD open or not. It seems like no matter what I do, these " big and all-mighty " sites keep putting my site down. *glares at a specific one* *cough* Not only that, but people hardly visit anymore, even though it's under a re-model. Even weeks before it went under a re-model, PD was getting slow attracation and only about four or five different people visited it and I was so bored because I had nothing to do BECAUSE people were not entering stuff and adopting. Only Tina and Bethany only give a crap to drop by and say hi every single time they are on, even though I am under re-model. * hugglesness them each* And for some reason, now I'm always the LAST one to hear about things around here, like about sites moving and such. Even my friends are starting to put down my work. So I've decided that PD MIGHT close, because I've just HAD IT. I love it so much, but I don't know if I have the time and strength to run it anymore. I'm too addicted to the computer, anways. And it seems as though every single one of my friends is abandoning me lately. * glances over and smiles at Bethany, because she is definitley one of the ones that haven't* *sigh* and I've just...not been feeling good lately. Kind of lonely and moody. Bored. Losing sleep. Everything. I've been abandoning homework and other stuff for the computer, which HAS GOT TO STOP, so in the summer, I am only going to update nights, probably every couple of days and not that big of updates. Lately I've just been having some trouble with friends, online and real life. Stuff like put-downs, and...other unementionable stuff even though I feel so mad and bored I am close to tears right now I'm just not going to mention... *sighs and runs off to talk to Bethany about it* I guess that means you can go now... |
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*Pant, pant*
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Haven't signed in
awhile...errr....it's been SO HOT here. About 34 degrees, which
is around 109 Fahrenheit in America. Geez. I'm sweating bad
right now and the fan is on...wait a sec *turns it full blast*
A little better...my pants are still sticking to my legs >.<
Anyways, right now I'm very hot and uncomfortable and have a
headache, so I'm not in the mood to talk about school right now,
or anything else that is going on in my social life right now,
either, just for nowness.
Some
news::
I'm still
not anywhere near being done re-modeling PD. I'm taking my time,
slow and easy. It won't be back up till around June 23. Also,
a few other pieces of news::
I'm creating a petz movie, based on what happened to
me, Dannii, and Alex's petz, and I'm also spending a long, slow,
careful time on that, so yeah. Alex is also co-owner of Petz
Town now; she has the one and only password to it XD Also,
Flower and Clyde had CHILDREN! YAYNESS ^^ That's it for nowness.
Oh, and PPK moved to a new URL and APP has a new layout. There.
Done<3
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Grrrrness.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Hi-hiness
again...okay, let's get straight to it. I want to get this
done and over with. I'm in a terrible, terrible mood today.
I've had bad headaches on and off all day, I'm extremely tired
and I'm losing sleep (I have dark circles under my
eyes...my mom even commented this morning that I looked
rough) the snobs in my class are still being arses, one of
my best friends in real life, named Tara, got her cat put down.
I know you're probably saying " at least it wasn't your cat, "
but you don't know him like I do. He was a wonderful cat and
Tara loved him so much. I cried a lot after she got done on the
phone with me to to report the news, so that's a major depression
thing for me, Sasy is still pretty sick, and I miss Erin. At
least we made up from our fight. Erin used to be my
ultimate-ultimate best friend, we talked every day, always did
everything together, always talked about eachother to other
people, always so grateful that we met. At least now we made up
after a huge, huge fight in January. I'd missed her sooo
badness. Anyways, the snobs keep making fun of me for being "
quiet ", and they keep being rude about me loving Japan; they
keep asking me rude questions and when they are around me they
make idiotic voices, apparently trying to speak Japanese, saying
" wock ichi wonk wichi wong " and all that stupid crap like
that. They think it's some crime to not mind Asian people; you see,
90 percent of my class are all racists. They always say stuff
like " Oh, I'm a Chinese person, I can't see straight " and "
Oh, I'm a Chinese person, I don't know how to put glue on this,
" and all that crap. It's their eyes they hate; apparently they
are stupid because of their eyes and the fact that they don't
speak English. What losers. *spits on them* Go to beeeep. -
censored - That's all for now... *huggeee sigh*
Not <3, Rylee |